In a very short synopsis, my life since I last wrote has been full of work, periods of apathy, joy, loneliness, contentment, and fire!

I’d like to focus on the “fire.”  I have often heard God say to me that before I’d be able to encourage others in this passion for social justice, I needed to live it myself.  In true “me” fashion, I’ve mulled over it for a long time, longed to get to the point of making the change, but unsure of how to do it.  I’m finally ready to dive head first into a lifestyle, not just life moments dedicated to social justice, or in other words, Jesus’ very life mission, to “preach good news to the poor, bind up the brokenhearted, proclaim freedom for the captives and release the prisoners from darkness, and proclaim the year of the Lord’s favor. . .” (Isaiah 61).  I want my life to reflect the God I love and follow.

The last four weeks my church has been going through a series entitled “There has to be more” based off Richard Stearn’s (pres of World Vision) book “A  Hole in the Gospel.”  I’m so beyond excited that the church has chosen to focus this series on a huge part of Christ’s mission that seems to be missing these days in the Western Church’s teachings.  I would love to go on, but for time sake, I’m cuttin to the chase.

Every week the church has provided challenges for us to engage in to remind us of the majority of the world that suffers in poverty and oppression. The first week we were challenged to go without water for 12 hours.  That was rough.  The second we were challenged to walk a mile to a water source, fill a bucket and a mile back.  The third week we were offered the opportunity to sign up to help pack food for Haiti or provide food for a local food bank, and this last week the challenge is to go 5 days with only rice and beans. 

The rice and beans challenge didn’t seem overly difficult to me when I first heard.  Honestly i thought to myself, “well I did it in Africa, I can do it here.”  However, in doing the challenge they asked us to be mindful of the condiments we added to  our beans and rice, and to remember the portions we took  considering some places only have a cup of rice and beans.  This was going to be harder than I thought.  I have a very difficult time, for a variety of reasons, when it comes to messing with what goes in my mouth and how it affects my body.  For me it’s a huge mind game because I care greatly about my health.

Day 1 & 2.  After day one I thought, okay, these beans and rice taste awful, but I can do this.  It helped greatly that I added spices to my beans for supper.  It also sucked however, that the rest of my family sat there eating roast beef and gravy, mashed potatoes, veggies and chocolate cake.  I was okay though, at least I had food I thought.  It really messes with me when I lack food.  That night when I tried to drift off to sleep, all I could think about were rice and beans.  I was fretting about getting up and having to put something so heavy in my stomach.  I fretted what 5 days of only rice and beans would do to my body.  I fretted about whether or not it was okay to use spices and drink coffee.  I reasoned that when I went to Africa I still  was able to eat other things besides rice and beans, why couldn’t I eat different things here.  And then I remembered pictures and stories on the news of Haitians desperate for food and water. . .and of the food riots. 

Day 2 was a bit more difficult.  I struggled with being in a bad mood because I had to eat rice and beans.  I contemplated not even eating because I considered that maybe not eating would be better than facing the rice and beans.  I loathed the brick feeling in my stomach and uneasiness I felt.  I had difficult conversations with people.  Some dear well-wishers told me I should add a little bit of spices and veggies because after all, people in other countries had a little bit of that!  I struggled with my own comfort- I did decide to add spices, but was I thinking about my own comfort and trying to make it through the challenge. . . .  Was I even doing the challenge for the right reasons?  I constantly thought about myself, dreamed of eating a banana, and attempted to reason my way out of the challenge.  I learned a lot already- I learned that there was absolutely no joy in eating when all you had was rice and beans- a joy that I came to expect as my right.  I considered and read up on the risks to health when only rice and beans were consumed.  I realized that no one should ever have to eat only rice and beans.  I realized how much what I ate affected my psychological well-being and energy level.  I began to consider ways I could be a little more uncomfortable so others could be a little more comfortable.  By the end of day 2 I believed I had learned enough and was ready to go home and break the challenge  thinking I didn’t need to finish.  And then I ran into God. . .and a new friend who started going to a Bible study with me.

Her first words when I expressed my doubts about finishing the challenge, “Don’t do it!!”  In my mind I thought, “ha, I’ll do it if I want to do it.  No one tells me what I can or can’t do.”  She continued by sharing her own struggle and story.  She decided to do the challenge with the bare minimum- no salt, pepper or spices and just tap water.  Hardcore I would say!  And then she described to me the options she had.  She had the option to eat or not to eat.  She had the option of which kind of beans to eat and which kind of rice to eat and how much or how little to eat.  Wow.  She then continued by comparing her options to that of those with little food- they had no options.  She described that for her the discomfort was worth it to understand what others in this world go through.  And on a personal note, for her it was even about discipline.  There are things in this life that when they are uncomfortable, we give up on them.  But she was challenging herself to push through the discomfort and become more disciplined.  I really don’t give her explanation justice!   But she had a good one.  Of course she said the option was up to me, and that is was a personal descision whether or not I continue, and that she would respect me either way, but then encouraged me to hang in there if I could. 

I thought about it on the way home, and God clearly spoke.  I considered how other people in way worse situations couldn’t just “give up” and run to comfort.  He reminded me of the verse I heard for years upon years growing up, “do unto others as you would have them do unto you.”  I think of myself constantly during this challenge- how i wish I was eating this or eating that, or what I’m going to eat when the challenge is finished.  I think of my discomfort, blah blah blah.  So in other words, as often as I’m thinking of myself, I need to be thinking of others.  I hold my own well-being in high esteem, therefore I need hold other’s well-being in high esteem also.  Somethings gotta give.

It’s Day 3, and those are my thoughts so far.  Just today I decided that it would be a really great reminder for me to take this past the challenge end date.  What if I would adopt this diet for 3 or 4 meals a week as a reminder.  Take my thoughts off of me, and focus on others.  Oh what this week of rice and beans is teaching me. . .thank you Jesus!

As I considered scouring my class notes and compiling a list of all the major ideas I learned, I’ll be quite honest- I got nervous and antsy.  That’s gonna take a little while, and I’m so excited to share my next steps with you- so I’m gonna post-pone that detailed list, give you the overview, and then divulge my next steps, k?  (I can hear you saying “o.k.” haha.)

Overview.

When you think of the “Great Commission,” what do you think of?  Most people tend  to say evangelizing, sharing the Gospel, answers such this.  And YES, telling others how God changed your life is certainly part of what Jesus asked of His disciples when He departed earth- but that’s not all of it.  “Go and make disciples of all nations” also entails discipling whole nations!  I don’t know about you, but I’ve never really been exposed to the broad strokes of the Great Commission, or the broad strokes of Israel’s history.  Let me explain. 

During this HIS course, I experienced true excitement and awe for God’s work during Old Testament times.  I began  to understand that God was attempting to shape the nation of Israel as a whole, to be a nation that flourished under His direction and care, and in turn it would be an example for the rest of the nations.  You know all the long and tedious chapters in Deut and Leviticus that tend to be a drag to read?  They are actually chocked full of really important, useful directions for the well-being of Israel and pertain to every aspect of the nation- health, economics, government, etc.  If you would like to read more, look for Landa Cope’s work- I actually felt like new life was breathed into the Old Testament for me!  . . .So back on target.  The nation of Israel flourished under God’s provision and direction, and suffered when it rejected His words.  God didn’t just care for the spiritual state of the whole nation, He cared about every facet of society.  I particularly enjoyed reading Kim Tan’s “Jubliee Gospel”- it was fascinating to hear God’s intended plan for the nation.  However, by the time Jesus arrived on the scene, Israel had too often rejected God’s ways, and it was time for God’s hope to spread to the nations.  Jesus lived, died, and rose again not only to redeem the nation of Israel, but every nation on earth because God plays no favorites- He longs for every nation to flourish and live fully.  And this is where we come in.  He left His Spirit to direct and empower those who faithfully trust in Him to carry on His love to the nations.  We, as His followers, are to spread that Hope He has given us into every sphere of society.  So what am I saying?  I’m saying that the way we can transform and disciple nations is by going into our respective fields as “normal” human beings who work, play, and live, but girded with the Holy Spirit, God’s ways, and our transformed lives.  Business people- go into your businesses and be the best business people you can be- but live as a Christ-follower in your place of business.  That may mean standing up for proper business ethics, or defending a position that refuses to exploit workers even if it means huge profits to the company.  Those in the service industry- serve with a geninue heart, a positive attitude, and uphold company rules.  Government leaders- encourage legislation that mirrors godly principles, speak up for those who are marginalized- even if it doesn’t get you the popularity you need to make it into office next year.  Moms and Dads who stay home with your children- train your children in godly principles, expose them to experiences that open their worldview, and love them unconditionally.  One of the greatest classes we had was our very last one- where a local artist came in, and while painting a portrait, shared with us how he lives his faith in the art world.  Another of my favorite classes involved a lawyer from a top lawfirm in London who was himself a committed Christian, and although he didn’t verbally push his Christian agenda, he made decisions in a godly manner that had repercussions throughout the whole firm.  This is what it means to disciple nations- living “normal” lives beaming with life and Light that undoubtedly transforms the sphere of society you are in.  This was the foundation of the school.  Transforming nations from the inside out.  We looked at history and history-makers.  It’s unreal how much of the Western world has been formed and has thrived because of those who believed in God and were committed to bringing His ways into the world.  I fear I cannot adequately convey all that I’ve learned or how full of hope I am that we can transform the world- but we truly can only because we belong to Him who holds our history, our present, and our future in His hands.  Wow.  My roommate and I would often discuss how we had no idea how we could possible make a difference in this world.  I mean seriously, we both said to ourselves, how could we possibily do anything or come up with any idea that someone else in history hasn’t already thought of?  But then we were reminded GOD was the giver of those ideas, and that He often uses the faithful minority. . .which is fortunate for us, since we have no significance of our own(in the world’s eyes) in this great big world!  So I’m asking God for some ideas if He wants to give them to me. . .   And on that note, here are some of the ideas that I feel God has given me about my next steps.

Next Steps.

As a final project, we were required to write our life/ministry Mission Statement, Vision Statement, and Framework for Analysis.  Here is an excerpt from my ten page Framework:

Isaiah 58:5-7, 10-11a

“Is this the kind of fast I have chosen, only a day for a man to humble himself? Is it only for bowing one’s head like a reed and for lying on sackcloth and ashes? Is that what you call a fast, a day acceptable to the Lord? Is not this the kind of fasting I have chosen:

to loose the chains of injustice and untie the cords of the yoke,Then your light will rise in the darkness and your night will become like the noonday. The Lord will guide you always. . . .”

To se the oppressed free and break every yoke?

Is it not to share your food with the hungry

And to provide the poor wanderer with shelter-

When you see the naked, to clothe him,

And not to turn away from your own flesh and blood? . . .

If you do away with the yoke of oppression, with the pointing finger and malicious talk,

And if you spend yourselves in behalf of the hungry and satisfy the needs of the oppressed,

Proverbs 31:8,9

“Speak up for those who cannot speak for themselves, for the rights of all who are destitute. Speak up and judge fairly; defend the rights of the poor and needy.”

—–

God’s heart for the oppressed, the poor and the powerless is etched all over the Bible. In the Old Testament, God instructed the Israelites to live in a structure of community that provided resources and connection for all people. The prophets spoke strong words of warning to nations that trampled the poor and powerless among them. Jesus’ life was characterized by radical association and service to those considered outcasts in society. It’s unquestionable- following Christ requires “spending yourself on behalf of the hungry,” “loosing the chains of injustice,” “satisfying the needs of the oppressed,” “speaking up for those who cannot speak for themselves,” and “defending the rights of the poor and the needy.” As a child of God, this is a call that God has placed on my heart, and to which my life is dedicated. Based on my understanding of Scripture and God’s intentions for His people, the best catalyst for serving the powerless and oppressed is the Body of Christ.

The Western world has a rich heritage of founders and reformers who heard God’s call, embraced it, and courageously served the world around them. And yet, the West has lost its roots and has evolved into self-reliant, Truth-thirsty nations. Unfortunately, parts of the Western Church has also been sidetracked from the foundations of the faith. In particular, the Church has become self-focused, saturated in materialism and complacent in comfort. However, God has blessed the Western world because of it’s godly foundations and has called His Church to properly steward that blessing, including using its influence and sharing its resources to support, defend and empower the poor and the oppressed. The heart of this framework is to see the Body of Christ in the Western world regain focus of Christ‘s intentions for His followers and to spread His love and hope into the world particularly through caring about the “least among us.”

Vision Statement

To see the Western Church operate in small discipleship communities naturally committed to personal growth, community transformation, and active engagement in social justice based on the understanding of God, His character and His ways.

Mission Statement

Defending, supporting, and empowering the oppressed and powerless of society through the justice, mercy, and hope of God.Values

-Respect: Highest regard for God, high value of other people and myself, care for the environment, and regard for every culture.

-Humility: A foundation stone of this ministry; humility in relationships, in communication, and in all conduct.

-Love: Unconditional love for God and others in every aspect.

-Passion: Demonstrating zeal, excitement and commitment to accomplish God’s call, and inspiring others to do the same.

-Integrity: Purity of heart, intentions, actions, and principles.

-Competence: Demonstrating competency and excellence in my field of endeavor.

-Shalom: Commitment to bringing about right relationship in a godly, upright manner; between people, institutions and creation.

-Accountability: Submitting one’s life and ministry to a chosen person, persons, or network in which full honesty, transparency, and answerability is required.

-God’s Word: Adherence to the truth of God’s Word and His principles as the foundation for life and purpose.

-Wisdom: Soundness of judgment

The framework consists of the introduction, the mission and vision statments, ten values, analysis of the internal and external opportunities and threats, goals, stategies, and actions. 

So what exactly is next you say?

Still a deeper phase of preparation for whatever lies in the future.  This time of preparation includes a lot of prayer, researching God’s intentions for community, and investigating past and present-day communities.  Now when I say “community”, what do I mean?  Generally, I mean people committed to God and each other, living life together, not being dependent on one another, nor being independent, but being inter-dependent.  I long to see a present day Acts-like church.  I don’t  want to eradicate what we think of today as the Church, but rather, work in conjunction and out of the present day Church.  But I don’t know what the details look like.  And I know it will look different because we are in different times.  Does is look like people living together?  Having a common purse?  Does it simply mean being part of a small group?  I don’t know.  And this year I’m on a quest to find out.  I want to do lot’s of research, and at the same time look for different types of present-day communities- and then, select a few to actually live in and with for a few months.  You can’t truly understand from the outside.  You gotta live it.  And then living it for a few months won’t even give you the ”real deal,” but merely a taste. 

You may be thinking, what happened to what she learned about living a “normal” life and changing that sphere of society?    At times I actually long to live a more stable life.  From a “normal” view, I seem to be on the path of a restless, needs-to-get-real idealist who has no permanent job.  Recently I was hanging out with college buddies and I kept thinking, wow, it would actually be really nice to have an apartment, get a real job, and have some sort of stability.  It’s not that I don’t want that, but there’s a greater cry in my heart.  Not a “higher” or better cry, just a different cry.  God has made me an adventurer by nature.  He has given me a heart for justice.  My life and the timing of it is not and will not look like most of my peers for awhile.  And I gladly accept that, because I have faith that God has a plan and for whatever purpose I am here, will bring it to fruition in His timing, just like He will in your life!    I love that God made us all different, but to work together to make this place more beautiful!

I may not have covered all the ground, but feel free to ask me questions!  There’s plenty more rolling around in my head.  Lot’s  more on my radar.  I’m always dreaming!   Would love to hear your feedback.  Thank you for trekking through this journey with me!  Until the next entry. . . cheers!

The first day of class we read Micah 6:8 together, and then each personally asked the Lord what He had to say to us about the verse. 

Micah 6:8  “He has told you, oh man, what is good; to act justly, to love mercy and to walk humbly with your God.” 

Upon listening intently to what God would have to say to me, my thoughts were directed to consider the order of God’s three commands in Micah 6:8, and my experiences and desires in relation to them.  From a very early age, God planted a strong desire within me to fight against life’s injustices- whether they be societal or personal.  After my journey in Uganda and as I considered my future, I just had to gain more knowledge as to why the world is in the condition it is, and how I could be part of a positive change.  As all my previous entries point out, I really believe God led me to Uganda for the main purpose of bringing me to a new level of intimacy and trust in Him.  And I will forever be grateful for that. 

When I dissect the order of requirements in Micah 6:8, I find it extremely intriguing that it seems like the author approaches it a bit inductively.  For instance, I understand my faith in that everything that I do is based upon my relationship with God.   Any positive, loving actions stemming from me are a direct result of God’s transformation of my life and His principles in me.  So in the case of this verse, loving mercy and acting justly are only a result of walking humbly with God.  The author, for some unknown reason to me, seems to be saying, “you people- you know what is good because of the innate knowledge God put in you.  You know that you should act justly.  You must also love mercy in actly justly, and that is all a result of your love and knowledge and intimacy with God.” 

God seems to be taking me on this very path.  He planted a desire within me to act justly- not simply to gain justice for myself, but also on behalf of those who are treated unfairly.  My whole lifetime has been a long discovery how to live in relationship with God.  Because of my lack of cooperation, some of the ground along that path could have been covered more quickly!  However, God is gracious and a true gentleman.  My heart was open when He called me to Uganda, and because of that, I feel like in seeking Him, I’ve found Him in ways I never have in my life.  I’m growing and maturing in my faith by God’s grace.  I’m really learning what it means to walk humbly before my God (and that will be a lifelong process). 

By the contents of this verse, I’m guessing my next one-on-one tutorial with  God is about ”loving mercy.”  Do you have a good concept of what that means?  I feel as though I certainly do not.  By nature I’m a bit of a firecracker.  Generally, I don’t mind confrontation- there is a part of me that enjoys it.  I love getting fired up and passionate about causes and trying to convince others of their importance.  I know it sounds strange, but I enjoy a “good” fight- a fight in that is respectful and civilized, but in which I get to passionately describe my view- whatever that topic or situation may be.  This has it’s pros and cons- but all that to say, I can’t say I’m by nature a mercy-loving person.  No, I’d much rather a person get the justice they deserve (. . .and this is why I’m still a work in progress).  So I’m eagerly waiting for God to teach me about loving mercy during this school, as I’m learning about the causes and history of injustice in the world.  I will update you along this journey as I seek God for what it means to love mercy and as He reveals His ways, character, and principles. 

The entire first two weeks were about “worldview.”  I feel like my worldview is already beginning to change!  The combination of the lectures and book creates a whirlwind in my mind- but it’s a terrific blustery mix.  My first book report was a on “His Kingdom Come”- by a compilation of YWAM authors.  The biggest ideas I gleaned from this book was a re-establishing of what the Great Commission really means. 

Matthew 28:18-20.  “Then Jesus came to them and said, ‘All authority in heaven and earth has been given to me.  Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you.  And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age.”

Authors Landa Cope and David Joel Hamiliton dissected what this verse, the Great Commission, is truly intended to mean.  Hamiliton says there are two major commands here.  The first is what I, and I’m imagining you, have typically heard in the church: in essence, go and tell everyone about Jesus.  Go evangelize.  Yes, Hamilton says this is one thing Christ asks of His followers- to take this news of great redemption and hope to the very ends of the world.  Hamilton says this is a mono-generational call.  Every generation is called to go into the ends of the earth, and has the ability to do this. 

The second prong of the Great Commission is to go and disciple nations- even baptizing them.  What does this mean?  The very meaning of the word “disciple” means to walk with, to  shape, to guide, to help craft.  We Christians are called to go shape the nations.  God has given us his love, principles and commands not so we may be  stifled living on earth, but that we have guidelines that nuture every part of us, including the deepest crevices of being human- our souls, our hearts.  His commands give life.  He wants us to give life to the nations.  We are called to go into  all spheres of society as godly people, living according to His principles, in order to affect and shape every sphere for the benefit of humanity and their knowledge of their Creator.

This means we need godly doctors, godly politicians, godly journalists, godly restuarant owners, godly stock-brokers- godly everyone!  And by living out those godly principles, we help to bring God into all spheres of society.  Discipling nations is a multi-generational effort.  It is an on-going process that cannot be accomplished in one generation- or even two or three!  This also means that we are responsible for shaping the future for other generations.  That requires looking at how our actions today will affect tomorrow. 

Landa Cope used her chapter to describe her revelation of how God directly modeled the discipleship of a nation.  The Old Testament is seemingly full of (in my words) “gross” and needless commands.  But when you unpack the commands, it turns out they shape every sphere of society and are a beautiful illustration of God’s principles for a nation!  There are even principles for cleanliness!  Of course God knew about germs and placed certain commands there for the own welfare of His people!  Under these principles, Israel goes from a struggling group of people to a strong and flourishing nation!  Check it out!  I’ve seriously never heard this teaching before and it totally impressed me!  God was caring for and shaping a nation!  And the bizarre and hopeful thing about it is, the Old Testment holds principles that are universal and applicable to even today’s government and spheres of society.  This has breathed so much life into my understanding of the Old Testament and God!!!

So what are the take-aways for me personally?  I want my life to be shaped by both “prongs” of the Great Commission.  My question is, however, what sphere of society am I to influence?  The quite comical, and not-so-ironic thing about it is, in EVERY speaker or lecture we had, the importance of media, writing, and/or journalism came up and POPPED out at me- even in the book!  I studied Communication in school, but Mass Media was my least favorite subject- I wanted nothing to do with media.   However, I’m seeing more and more the influence of media and the need for godly principles to penetrate this area.  I’m currently praying about my future and what steps to take next- and I think it might be in this area. . .we will see! 

Although a revival of the Great Commission’s meaning was a large chunk of what I grasped and of what excited me this week, many small nuggets of truth stuck with me.  There’s no doubt about it.  I want to be a world-changer.  I’ve started a list of steps on becoming a word-changer, and traits of historical persons of influence.  Here’s a little snippet of my week’s reflections from my journal:

“Oct. 1, 2009

Rome self destructed because it was  based on it’s own standards, it’s own understanding, it’s own reasoning.  It became apathetic- and all areas of it’s life lacked- even the arts.  All societies and modern-day empires mirror Rome in that they are self-destructing because they are not based on God or His outlined principles.  Why is Africa, India, and Haiti hurting?  We have a responsibility to stop being apathetic.  We just not seperate ourselves by our line of affluence and personal peace- but be shaken to action.  The Great Commission calls us to evangelize and disciple.  Discipling nations means literally guiding them in every area for the betterment of not onlly our generation but those to come.  Why care?  Because we must have a high respect for others and because God adn His message is spread through our obedience.  We are helping soeicty, improving society, enriching lives.  I’m responsible to develop the gifts God has given me, and use them to disicple and evangelize the nations.  I have the gift of writing and communication.  Mass media shapes the lives of people everyday.  Maybe I should consider developing my mass communication/journalism abilities.  I don’t have to be a majority to influcence the consensus as Dr. Francis Shaeffer says.  Lord, what do You think about that?  I’m on the right track.  Not there yet tho.  Keep plugging along.  I need to know why I believe what I believe, and develop my political awareness in order to change society, my government. That truly is social justice.  It’s not what I pictured, but it a part of where it starts.  I need to be a woman of faith by being certain of reality, and then watching and working to change it!  Be aware of reality, prepare accordingly, and then wait in the moment of tension and faith to see how God changes that reality.”

I know that was a lot of repeat, my apologies, but there it is for whatever it’s worth!  Those are not all my ideas- they are an intertwining of all the speakers and book authors. 

A few more “take-aways:”

• Be saturated in the Word!  from there He will release the secrets of the universe!  Can you imagine that?  Sometimes I would like to think that all there is to know is already here or only left for the highly intelligent to discover.  I mean, c’mon.  What could I possibly come up with that no one in the world today or in the history of the world hasn’t already thought about?  The thing is, GOD was the one that gave them all the those good ideas and revelations!  God, Creator of the world, probably has loads more left for us to discover and delight in.  And all we have to do is ask Him!  Wow- that’s revolutionary.
• God speaks loud enough for you to hear!
• Challenge established thought!
• Artists are the prophets in society.  They try to communicate that which is not thre reality today- but reality of the future.  They advance things.  Everyone knows what reality is today.  Write about what is not yet.  In such a way you influence the way society thinks.
• Plato:  “that kind of oratory which partakes of (koinoneo #2841) the kingly art because it persuades men to justice and thereby helps to steer the ship of state.”
• Keep asking God and seeking Him for the future,  for creativity, for new ideas!
• There are four basic positive values: high view of God, high view of people, high view of self, high view of sacrificial love
• Jessica Jackley-  check out this lady!  She’s only 26 and has co-created the worlds first peer-to-peer online micro-lending website.  She says, “change your belief in people, and that is enough to motivate!”

So that’s enough for now   Transforming the world one worldview at a time. . .

my class at Parliament. . .plus a few

our dormitory

our sweet lil town

St. Albans Cathedral

our chapel

me! in love with the architecture, stained glass, and doorways

Parliament, with Big Ben standing tall in the background

my dutch roomie (and friend!)

I feel like I have a lot of catch up to do- so allow me to use some bullet points!

• Upon arriving, I was blown away by how well this place fit me.  The base was simply beautiful, the food was delightful and included veggies and fruit!, the base is located within walking distance of a really fantastic town and placed in the heart of a suburb, the base is incredibly multi-cultural, there is a morning work-out that is encouraged and the base is deemed as “health conscious,” the courses are beyond what I could have hoped for in content, and I love my roomie- the only other female student in the class!  .. . .not to mention the base is saturated with God-fearing, globally conscious people!
• My team is comprised of six males- one from Cameroon, one from Central African Republic (and his wife), one from Holland, one from the US, one from Rwanda, and another from South Africa, who brought his wife and adorable baby girl; and two females- me, and a Dutch girl, whom I get along with extremely well and in which I’ve found so many similiarities!  We have five leaders- each from a different country- one from Britian, one from Ghana, and three from Asia.  At times the multi-cultural differences can prove interesting,  but overall I LOVE it! 
• I began the first week absolutely in full-force mode!  I was completely there and hanging on every word- because I was so excited and certain about my purpose of being here!  Now, two weeks later, I am so proud of myself for entering into the school full force and still completely convinced of my being here, but also with a better understanding of myself and the school.   The first two weeks of school were filled to the brim- classes every morning and sometimes in the afternoon, sometimes evening classes, community meetings, intercessory prayer meetings, work duties, field trips- we were even going on Saturday.  Because of the intense schedule, meeting new people and getting adjusted to a new routine, finding my niche in everything, along with highly engaging classes, loads of new information, the pressure of homework, and God moving in my heart, I became intellectually, socially, emotionally, and spiritually exhausted- which led to me getting sick.  While all of this sounds negative, it’s absolutely not!  It’s just the result of so many wonderful things and the natural reality of transitions.  I took a much needed sick day, in which I slept 16 hours, and then through the night- so by God’s grace I am back in action- only a bit more hestitantly and humbly. 
• Our first book report was due today!  We read the book “His Kingdom Come,” which is a compilation of authors.  Albeit lengthy, it’s great!  We also have a test tomorrow on all the countries in Africa and their capitals!  I think I can nail it. . .as long as I don’t have to say the name out loud! hahaha.
• We took a field trip to London last thursday.  Our primary reason for going was to tour Parliament.  It was AMAZING.  The main parliamentary building is at least 1000 years old and simply gorgeous.  There is a chapel there dedicated to historical martyrs which I wish so very much I could have taken pictures of!  I came away with a much greater understanding of Britian’s Parliament, in which I still feel like I have SO much to understand.  Did you know Great Britain is the only constitutionally named Christian nation?  (i think i got that right)  The Queen is considered the head of the Church!  By the way, I was only a few feet away from her throne!
• Life on the base is. . .definitely communal!  It is a bit of a personal challenge for me going from little structure and significant independence to a highly structured life where basically all you do and say is under the observance of your classmates, leaders, and fellow community members. . .you talk about social control!   It’s a good change though- and I’m continuing to work out the kinks for me. . .which chiefly concerns my lack of desire to socialize in the morning. . .haha.
• One of my very favorite practices of this YWAM base happens every monday at lunch.  The students of all classes happening on the base are invited to a staff member’s house for lunch.  Sometimes there isn’t a chance to get to know staff on the base, and this is a wonderful time to get connected in community and get a taste of other cultures!  My first meal was with a Brazilian family
• This past weekend we attended the Willow Creek Global Leadership Summit.  Unfortunately I only went to one day because of being sick- but that one day was worth it!  I will hopefully comment more on this seminar when I have my notes handy!

So now that I’ve caught you up a bit on what has been happening, my next entry will contain nuggets of what I’ve been learning and how God has been stirring.

Cheers!

Please forgive my absence- I can safely say it is because of two reasons.

 Number one, the very main reason- I’ve been reluctant to write the “final” entry on my Africa adventure for I feel a great responsibility to adequately describe my experiences, my learnings, and my emotions- and I’m still not sure I can put the right words together to express all that. It runs deep. Sometimes, I still just cry when I think of my experiences in Africa. I cry because it was so hard. I cry because the truths I learned were so deep, real and good. I cry because of the condition of my brothers and sisters there. I cry because I miss the girls and children at the center. I cry because at times I forget them. And I cry because I was changed, and don’t know how to tell you about it.

The second reason I’ve failed to write is because I’ve been so wonderfully busy at home! Of course, everyone’s busy. This is no good excuse. What have I been doing? I’ve been working for my father at his business, attempting to spend quality time with my immediate family, exercising, and then, in the last few weeks- getting ready to go to England!!! . . . More on that in later, for that is from where I am writing!

I feel as though I have much I could say about my time in Africa. But I want to boil it down to the important things.

I will never be the same in two main aspects.

Number one: spiritually. This trip was incredibly hard because for the first time in my life, it was only God and I- my closest friends and family were on another continent. Even when I was on the buses alone, or surrounded by people but feeling completely unknown, God stood by me. He knew my feelings. He comforted me. He stretched me. He listened to me. He spoke to me. He became the one with whom I shared my thoughts. We became so close because of that, and it will forever change me. That’s what my entire trip was about- God taking me to a new level of intimacy I could not reach until I was stripped just about bare of all my physical support systems. It was then that He became my support system- it was then I realized that He is all I would ever need, and what it looked like to rely on Him. It’s as if God used my time in Africa to set a standard for me of what kind of intimacy we could have and more, if He truly is my only focus- if He is where I pour all my attention.

God also used this time to increase my understanding and awareness of spiritual warfare. At times God allowed me to feel the heaviness of the enemy, and began to teach me the victory I have in Jesus to silence and overcome enemy attacks. He continues to graciously teach me.

And secondly, the way I live my life will forever be impacted by my time in Uganda. God used this trip to break through my blindness and ignorance to show me how most of my brothers and sisters around the world are living. That breakthrough began with the understanding that these Christians are my neighbors, they are part of my community, and I must start treating them how I would like to be treated. Are you familiar with the statistics that say 20% of the world’s population has 80% of the world’s resources? It’s hard to see my brothers and sisters just fighting to survive; especially when I, and everyone I know at home, has a surplus. There’s no reason I couldn’t have been born as one of my sisters in Africa or India or Peru. I did absolutely nothing to deserve the stability and opportunity of education, daily food, and nice clothing, not to mention the chance to enrich my life with “extras” such as sports, music and dance lessons. I can’t fathom the pressure my sisters’ feel every day to simply find food to give their children. Any kind of “quality of life,” as we like to say it in America, is not even on their radar. What if the 20% in the world would share with the 80%? And yes, I am part of the 20%- and more than likely, you are too. What would it look like if Christians in the US would all get together in one mass movement and say “hey- we are going to live radically different. The Bible says the world will know us by our love for one another. What greater way of sharing love than sharing what we have? Maybe even sharing in their pain?” Sharing in their pain doesn’t mean necessarily going over there. No, in fact, I think that denouncing the norms of our culture and not spending our money on “extras” is painful enough for us. Me included. I’m still trying to learn how to live this way. And you know what? I fail. But I’m on a quest to learn how to share- because no one deserves to go without food when I have a full tummy and decide to drink a latte too. It’s a learning process. We gotta start though. I challenge you to start with a book called the “Irrestible Revelution” by Shane Claiborne. It’ll rock your world.

With that said, I will now bring you up to date, and to England with me! :)  Wow- never thought we’d travel from Africa to England, eh? Me neither. As I mentioned in an earlier entry, I felt God leading me to YWAM- however, I may have gotten confused about which YWAM. While at the YWAM base in Jinja, Uganda, I considered doing the Foundations of Community Development School because many questions arose from my experiences in Africa, and I longed to become educated in those areas. However, I did not have a peace about the Community Development School, nor did I find methods of African farming completely relevant to what I wanted to pursue. Therefore, I continued to pray, along with my core prayer group. During this time I had some passing thoughts of interest about doing a YWAM school in England- which was quite odd considering I had about a 5% desire to go to England. I simply dismissed my thoughts as mere dreaming, and carried on. However, my mentor contacted me to tell me that she had been impressed with the word “Harpenden” in connection with me and my future. She looked up the YWAM base to find they were offering a Humanities and International Studies (HIS) course in September. I read the description and was thrilled! The school addressed a macro level approach to changing society- which is ultimately what I longed to find more about. I had a taste of the grassroots approach, but that didn’t seem to quench my appetite for change. Not to say grassroots efforts are not needed- they most certainly are- I’m just saying that I was interested in learning about a different approach. I delayed sending in my HIS application because I wanted to be sure this was the direction I was to be traveling. Because of the delay, and my ignorance as to how long it would take to get a visa, I waited till about a month before the school started to send in my application.

I’m so thrilled to follow a gracious and sovereign God! By the time everything was said and done, I finally sent my visa application to the British Embassy two weeks before I was to leave the country. The YWAM base told me that only 15% of applicants are granted their visa in ten days- the rest usually take 30 days or more. Needless to say, I was praying up a storm- as well all my wonderful prayer partners whom I couldn’t do without! Might I also say that I was unable to purchase my ticket until I had my visa! A week after sending my visa, I received an email saying that they received my application and would start processing it within 24 hours of the next business day. That was a Saturday. On Monday my inbox gave me a lovely email saying that I was granted the visa and that my UPS tracking number would be available within the next two business days. I was so excited, and thought I would probably get it by the end of the week and be only a few days late to the school. The very next day my mom calls me at work to tell me that she held in her hand, at that very moment, my passport and visa!!! I couldn’t believe it! I was shocked! What was even crazier, is that my mom was in her bathroom with the music blaring when the UPS guy came. She thought she heard something and decided to go check it out. As soon as she saw the UPS man, she ran to the window, yelled for him to wait, got dressed and signed for my visa! The day before she was in the bathroom with the music on low when she didn’t even hear the doorbell- it was a miracle that she heard, and was even home- for every other day that week we had plans to be gone!! God most definitely arranged the timing, and it was incredibly impeccable. The subject line of my prayer letter the week before read, “. . .nothing short of a miracle,” in which I described my need for one. The subject line of my next email? “And God is not short on miracles!” J I was estatic!!! Thank you Heavenly Father!!!

 Getting a ticket was also a source of stress to me. The prices kept going up, and I was very concerned. Wednesday evening my precious mother and I stayed up late looking for tickets. The cheapest one we found was simply amazing- it had just the perfect times, was a straight flight, and believe it or not, was with the airline of my choice! I was thrilled and praising God once more for His provision. I’m still blown away!

I left the States last Friday night to embark on another phase in this journey of my life. You know, when I left, I had so many emotions going on inside me. It all happened so fast that I wasn’t sure which end was up! Being in the airport brought up a lot of emotions from my African adventures just two months earlier, and I truly questioned whether or not I was prepared to embark on another experience so soon. At the same time, the airport brought a strange sense of peace and closeness with God. I was reminded of His provision and care for me before, and I was so ready to see what He had for me next. This time, rather than nervousness, I had a peculiar confidence- in fact I was wondering if I was being too confident as I eased through airport security and found my terminal. For better or worse, I was where I believed God wanted me, and prayed for humility to be my guide.

Once I landed in London, I had to locate a coach bus that would then take me to another airport where YWAM would pick me up. I’m telling you, the flight and the transitions were so smooth I thought I was dreaming. I know I know, I can hear you now- “really? Is she just making all this up, to sound better or to create an idyllic story?” Absolutely not. I was amazed myself- everything was just incredible. Lucy, one of the school staff picked me up from the airport, drove me around town to run some errands, and then took me to the base.

And this is where my next entry will start- I’m SOOOO excited to tell you about my time so far. . .but enough for now. I’ve already stretched it! :) So much more to come. And as also dear friends, family and strangers, thanks for reading!!!

So come to me with revelation of the fraility of this life

So prone to wander, so prone to stray, so prone to lose heart and lose my way

But i will not despise the sowing of seeds, for i know in due time, i will reap, i will see the fruit of my labor for all eternity, so i give myself wholly to Thee

There’s a reason i told you to  set your mind on things above, there’s a reason i told you to set your eyes on me

Nothing in this life will ever truly satisfy, the desires of your heart

To see the weight and see the glory of what your doing

I hear You say

See the weight and the glory of what your doing

Every single choice you make

it is affecting your Forever

See the weight and the glory of what you are doing

This is eternal life, that you know Jesus Christ

-a beautiful song, to whom i don’t know the author (modified by me)

As I’m reflecting on my life now and decisions I must make, I realize more than ever that this life is not just for the now, but for the eternity.  It isn’t necessarily for my enjoyment.  This life isn’t about me.  This life is about the community I live in- the local and global community.  This life is about reflecting the God I live for.  How can I  live in such comfort in America when people are dying here from famine, when i see old men and children rummaging through the trash for food.  I can’t live like that.  What if I was that old man?  What if you were that child?  But you aren’t, and I’m not.  And that means you and I have choices to make.  Life long choices.  I’m currently wrestling with mine.

A few weeks ago, the community remembered the 5th year anniversary of the Lukodi massacre.  The site of the massacre is right where I am staying right now.  When the first ChildVoice team arrived to set up camp in Lukodi, bullet holes and blood still splattered the walls, shoes and pottery were still strewn everywhere, and a blind man and cows had moved  into the classrooms of the school.  Two years before the CVI team arrived, the LRA invaded the Lukodi community killing 30-40 people in a matter of a couple hours.  No one touched the school building before the CVI team.  It is now the CVI rehab center, turned into something positive- but still remembered every year for the lives lost and the community affected.  I was humbled to have the chance to participate in the fifth year memorial service.  After the Bishop spoke, a visit to the memorial statue, and traditional dancing, the ceremony concluded with food and a football (soccer) game.  Here are a few pictures.  The CVI girls, who also sung in the ceremony, are in the red shirts.

listening to the Bishop

traditional dancing by the community

one of my favorites (shh!!), enjoying the game

While the mommas went to the ceremony, the kids played. . .in the dirt

too adorable. . .

and another one of my favorites. . .who just started walking! so exciting!!

chi chi

Every now and then we do a little nail paintin.  The girls love red!! . . .and yes, everyone gets their nails painted- even the 7 year old boys love it.  Nothin wrong with that y’all! (p.s. Lowna took this pic)

Life is, well, unpredictable! Gotta love it.   We decided to plant pineapples. . .trying to transport hundreds of plants is another thought.  On the way to Lukodi, the pineapples tried to escape three times via the trunk! 

picking pineapples off the road for the third time!

Starting June 1st, we have had lot’s of visitors!  This is a pic of some of the first team with a few of the girls.  I really enjoyed that team- great personalities, sweet worship, and good times. . .including a hike up the mountain making our own trail, quite amusing and a little difficult!  The girls loved this team too as you can tell by their expressions!

saying goodbye to the team hip hip hippy. . .

One of the most significant experiences I had with the team was doing “hut to hut” evangelism.  I am a bit of a skeptic when it comes to door to door evangelism- I definitely appreciate the more relational approach.  However, it had been a long time since I went out on this type of endeavor, and because I felt God urging me to go, I went.  We broke up into teams in a local IDP camp, and went to see who was home.  Quite a few of the people we spoke with had great difficulty accepting Christ because of their occupation- beer brewing.  They brewed beer in their huts to make a living because they had little other ways to make an income, and they knew this was not pleasing to the Father.  I must be honest- it was so hard seeing people struggling to say ”yes” to God because that could mean lack of food or medicine or clothing.  That’s truly what it means to be a follower, huh?  . . .having to deny yourself and trust God for every need. . . and allowing Him to provide for you as He promises in His word.  They also struggled with the fact they could not see the witch doctor or smoke.  We didn’t imply such rules- they knew this without us having to say a word.  The second day we went out, was quite incredible to me for a number of reasons.  As I had the opportunity to share personally, it was radically different than times in the past because of my heart condition.  Previously, whenever I would share, I would have this eery, haunting feeling of doubt in the back of my mind.  How could I share this stuff if I wasn’t 100% convinced myself? But this time, it flowed from my heart, and my experience.  It was beautiful and challenging; for it had been awhile since I had to verbally share my faith with someone who did not know God, or knew little about Christ himself.  I know this is silly, but when we met a young mother who did not know the Creation story, much less how much Christ loves her, it was surprising to me.  To be painfully honest, I know people like this exist, but I had never come face to face with anyone who knew nothing about God!  Even in a predominately Christian nation, knowledge of Jesus is lacking- much less relationship with Him!  I have been asking God my calling, what my passion is to be- and the answer is the same to everyone, and yet I’ve forgotten and left it to others- to go and make disciples.  And I’m beginning to realize it is imperative that telling others about Christ must accompany my works, for works without faith is dead.  This is my calling- the rest is just details.

african buffalo

Pauline and I bartering in the market!

Bramuel and friends in Nairobi

the Great Rift Valley!

my safari truck

zebras!!

giraffes!

riding a camel!! with my friend Shady

i plaited my hair again!!! ten times better